Here and Now

I can't believe it's already mid-January, this month seems to be flying by! Today, as I was doing some things in the kitchen, I looked over at Grace and realized LIFE is flying by! She was sitting happily at her art table coloring a picture and singing. I can't believe how quickly she is turning from a baby into a little girl. Where did the time go?! Her sweet little voice always makes me smile (except when it's saying "no," then I'm more irritated than anything else!), and listening to her sing is the best music to my ears there could ever possibly be. In another two months, she will be a big sister, won't that be an interesting transition?! In the meantime, I want to savor every moment we have together, just us. I want to laugh at how silly she is for putting socks on her hands. I want to let my heart melt every time she hugs me and gives me a love pat, or does the sign for "I love you" over and over. I want to savor every "momma" because I know it won't always sound so precious and sincere. I want to appreciate her wanting to sit in my lap and read stories or watch Sesame Street podcasts on her "bipod." I want to find humor in the fact that every meal must be accompanied by "dup," which is her word for both ketchup and maple syrup. And I want to enjoy our evening routine of having to kiss every animal and picture in her room, sing "itsy" at least twice, and say a ni-nite prayer sometimes 4 or 5 times before getting in bed. Each of these things, in and of themselves, can be frustrating or tiring at times. Wrap them all up into one long day with a momma who is tired and doesn't have much energy, well...let's just say I tend to overlook how sweet, innocent, and incredibly lovely they are.

I used to never spend time in the moment, rather I was always thinking about the next thing, what I needed to plan for. Motherhood has taught me to slow down and be mindful of that instant. It has taken a lot of practice, and I want to be even better. I want to focus always on what is rather than what could or should be. Otherwise, 18 years will blow by and I will have lost precious moments that can never be relived. Last week after Little Gym, I took Grace to Jamba Juice for a treat. As we drank our smoothies and shared a banana, I was overcome with the longing to take pictures of us sitting there and share them with others. I had left my phone in the car, and instantly knew it was a blessing in disguise. I got to spend 15 solid minutes "chatting" with my girl and enjoying our time rather than snapping pics and texting or posting them on facebook. It was my favorite 15 minutes of the whole week, and I am so grateful for them, even if there are no pictures to prove what a sweet setting it was. In this fast-paced, instant-info world we live in, these are the moments that count. I need to be mindful of that and enjoy them while they last!